Tuesday, January 03, 2006

one more short lived new years resolution

my new years resolution of not waking up drunk on the floor next to a keg, with vomit on my chin, and very little recolection of the previous night was broken quickly. i was woken new years day by a pantless rob and a shirtless curtis telling me I puked on the keg, the floor, and into a plate. What happened last night? why am i on the floor next to the keg? what is this on my chin? obviously some kind of cuzzin party had just ended. but what kind and where are all the cuzzins? and rob's pants? when i began to wonder what the carpet puke looked like i was happy, scared, and most of all surprised to see the vomit stain on the floor was a small, condenced circle of black. the plate was dried and looked like the remenence of some sort of greasy onion sandwich. did i eat onions last night? did i eat anything last night? to my recolection, no. i quickly remembered being shot in the neck by a well-aimed shampagne cork, shot by matt, moments after being called into the room. i remembered dancing with three guys who looked like beck. and i remembered demanding people to drink water from an empty tequilla bottle that i had carried around for some time. vague memories of stair baggo, fooseball, some really quiet guy we aparently dubbed Chili, whiskey, tequilla, shampagne, drinking games, keg stands, dropping a 30 year old doing a keg stand, bong stands, and of course wrestling with the new guy came back quickly. fortunatly my attempt to remember the missing night that had unlimited potential was interrupted by the sudden realization that i was still too drunk to sit up. so, after a while, i stood up, went to the bathroom, puked for a while, then sat down with a towell next to the puke stain trying to clean it after rob told me i had to. unfortunatly cleaning the keg was not an option. sorry. I was hung over for a day and a half. if anyone has pictures, i need them. the night is a mystery, i still dont remember puking, and i apologize if me puking on the keg killed the party.

dee has good pics. she should post those. im being spanked by rob in one. fortunatly for everyone(especially me) he still had his pants on. she also has the math, and the aftermath, of the bong stand.

one last addition. my knuckle is cut up. does anyone know if i fought someone or something?

4 comments:

The Cheese said...

I'm 29 thank you very much.

DEE said...

Your knuckles are probably cut up from wrestling, though I prefer to picture you punching the keg while you puke in it...

Anonymous said...

huh, sounds like Jerome's down on his luck. Is this just a case of Day-After-Depression? Or did you guys just push him too far?

The Cheese said...

Actually, he pushed me to far. Over the keg that is. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahah