Finish the sandwich contest

Peanut Butter and ________ sandwich.

Winner of my choosing gets a surprise gift in the mail. Limit one entry per person.

linkery

http://www.yesbutnobutyes.com/archives/2007/03/top_15_unintent.html

i like the #1 the best, so much so that i am suspicious of editing.

For the Smiths

I know you smith kids will appreciate this nice little party trick.

Turn a Match into a Rocket

Tightly wrap the head of a paper match with a small piece of tinfoil. Take a needle and pierce the tinfoil at the very tip of the match head. Place the match on the mouth of an empty bottle. Hold a flame to the tinfoil for a few seconds. Liftoff! (Number 3 on the diagram)

In You, Endo

You know what, there is a lot of sexual innuendo associated with tools. First of all, tool, of course. But there are so many others. Screw, hammer, nail, nut…I greased up my tool, screwed her from the top, hammered her from the bottom, worked her from behind, nailed her from the side, then nutted and bolted. Really, there are few items that aren’t in use as innuendo, but perhaps they should be. Let’s see now. I took one look at her washer, and decided then and there I would wrench it one day with my hot glue gun. No? How about: ooooh, my, hand me a tape measure and that tube of white caulk!

Best Rant Ever

http://www.hulu.com/watch/56636/saturday-night-live-really-michael-phelps

www.hulu.com rocks by the way.

I need a display name

I would like a display name that is a play on my real name, Jeremy Charles Smith. mike literus is only funny for, well, not very long. i need something pleasing yet sophisticated. something that rolls off the toungue and yet still sounds like a poorly executed fart joke.

any suggestions?


I also like the last blog post about acronyms. if you, my beloved cousins, are so inclined, i would like to propose another creative seed. someone give me a defination for the word flog or flogger.

BMW

I need help with a humorous meaning to the acronym BMW (the car). The real acronym stands for Bavarian Motor Works but I'm looking for a humorous alternative. Anything goes.

OBAMA'S HUGE PACKAGE DOES LITTLE TO STIMULATE

President Barack Obama's king size package may not provide the stimulation lady liberty needs. One reputable source is quoted as saying, "although the package looks big, its basically just nuts!" How deep will the package penetrate? A source close to the president said that people will feel the trickle down from the package in their hands, though most of it will be received in their pockets. Yet, skeptics of his package say the two main pieces are are so close to taint. "When he blows it I am going to take it on the chin," said another. After personally observing the package I have learned of this funny looking part of the package that is sandwhiched between pork and the "legs" of the package. Just as this article was being printed, a bisexual street walker exclaimed, "on the inside I like his package."

Kyle inside Kyle

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQ7J7UjsRqg

Kyle inside Kyle, Rubby, are you guys performing research like this? Finally, humanity is making headway.