To me, the ideal realtionship starts with some honesty. You discuss the things you like to do, you find out what matches up, and you do those thigns together, You don't start giving each other rules and expecting the other person to fill all the other spots taht you need filled. I say radical honesty the whole time, always know where you each stand.
So I had this working for a while, once a week we matched up for dinner, conversation or a couch movie and some sex. then she told me she loved me, and I told her i didn't so much love her. In fact, I love a girl from my past still probably. So that ended.
Then I meet a new girl. Again, we match up for a couch movie and sex a few times, as those are the only roles i need filled right now. Tonight, she calls me, says she's bored, I say I'm writing, I won't entertain her, she get a little pissed. I decide it's time to share this philosophy with her, how I want to know exactly what she's looking for and tell her that this is all I'm looking for, and I don't want her to get too attached. She says that's fine, she wasnt looking for love, but she doesnt really like sex that much. Never has. SO i tell her, that's fine, we still have movies, I'll call you nex time I want to watch a movie on the couch with somebody. We talk a little more about how it's a relief to know where each other stand, and i decided I should also mention that I will evantually, and probably more sooner than later, find a girl that is into not only couch movies, but also sex, and she will probably be replaced. So now that's over.
So I guess I'm wondering what you guys think of my relationship philosophy. I am still a proponent, and I don't see these as failures. We kept everything on the surface, and realized that things didn't match up so well, and ended things civilly. well not civilly. Both times the girl was quite mad and I was fighting back not laughing. Am I emotionally shallow? I suppose I am. quite shallow, probably.
A rapper I like, atmosphere, defined relationships as sexual positions and emotional investments. Maybe i'm just a very conservative emotional investor. It's not that I'm afraid to lose, I enjoy being sad and getting through it. SO what's my problem then. I do not know. And now I realize that everyone who reads this is in a relationship, so i don't know, maybe i need someone to tell me the joys of love or soemthing, because I'm just not seeing it. I find tonight's event funny, and I'm probably going to call a different girl to see if she'd like to watch a movie on the couch tomorrow, starting the whole process anew. hmmmmm. maybe i'll leave out the part of her being replaced soon.
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I agree with most of your thoughts. I have been a proponent of a constant exchange of thoughts between the two. Very similar to being completly honest. The more that we just talk and say everything on our minds the better. I find that its not only in opposite sex relationships but in every relationship ever with anyone. As for you being shallow I DONT THINK SO> PERSONALLY I THINK THAT ONE DOESN"T GO SEARCHING FOR LOVE IT MORE OR LESS HITS YOU LIKE A FUCKING FASTBALL IN THE ANUS> YOU CAN"T REALLY HELP ITBUT MAYBE THAT WAS JUST ME> i think it may tend to happen wen your both in very vulnerable stages of your life and you latch on to somebody unconciously then you become codependent.
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