this time i thought id do something more interactive.
what is your favorite word and why?
mine is suspiciously because it is so damn flexible.
George Clooney is suspiciously dreamy.
Those boobs are suspiciously large.
I masterbate suspiciously often.
2 girls, 1 cup was suspiciously popular.
7 comments:
Stoic.
Because it´s flexible and has always been an interesting debate for me. I define it as indifference to pain and pleasure. So you could use it like ´he stoically accepted his fate´ This used to be a goal of mine; first because I thought it pretty bad ass and tough. This was probably when i was 16 and concerned with being tough. Then it remained a goal when i thought that they most important part of life was to lead an interesting one, one full of stories, and that the abandonment of comfort was critical. Surely one leads a more story-worthy life when when they aren´t motivated by any sort of pleasure or avoidance of pain. It remained a priority when I got more into spirituality. Actually I believe spirituality is the primary usage of the word; accepting your life and the world in a daoistic way. I think I came decently close to being stoic around the age of 20.
But as you become indifferent to feelings, it comes with a certain apathy and numbness. It means indifference, which is boring and motivation sapping. Feelings are a pretty interesting part of life, and should not be muscled out of one´s life experience. They add a lot of color to our lives. If you´ve achieved stoicism or even enlightenment, why bother to do anything. When Curtis died, I didn´t really cry much, and I hated myself for it. How could someone who preached the importance of leading an interesting life reject feelings, which provide a lot of life´s flavor. It was also a time when I was reflecting very admirationally on the life he lived. He was extremely affected by the world, letting things as simple as songs or the everyday problems of others to bring him to drastic emotional highs and lows. I realized that he actually lived for emotions and decided that this should be my goal as well. A little later I was overjoyed to find myself reduced to sobbing over the movie ´´Big Fish´ which really wasnt that sad.
I´ve been reflecting on my time in Argentina a lot these last few days, and am not sure which of these sides of stoicism I have been and want to favor more. It´s probably ideal to have a bit of both. I´ve done a fairly good job of accepting and moving on from my struggles to be understood, be alone in a strange place, and take countless disgusting shits in bad bathrooms. Yet I´ve opened myself up to some other more interesting sensations, such as surprisingly painful goodbyes of friends i´ve only known for 24 hours, and thee deep frustration about my unwavering inability to meet girls on the dancefloor.
So I´ll change the serenity prayer to ´god grant me the serenity to ignore the sensations that bore me and the strength to accept the ones i find intersting.´
Favorite word: Clooney.
How to get dancefloor ladies: thin, well manicured & lubed (but not too lubed) mustache.
Skipping Kyle, staying with stoic: a word I like too, but I always gave it a religious connotation, like pious + brave, maybe just because its a vowel-heavy word and so is pious.
Big Fish?!? That cracks me up!!! I laugh b/c I can sympathize, though - I sobbed uncontrollably at an episode of Hogan's Family where their house burned down and they lost the only pictures of their mom that they had (she was dead). And my mom caught me and that was really embarrassing b/c the only emotion in my house was anger and crying was weak (or at least that was the message I got from never seeing anything but anger from my parents). I'm trying not to pass that on to Sean, but I'm obsessed with him not being a wimp, so its not going very well. I have very traditional ideas about men, for a feminist. I'd apply the same to a girl, but that would be in line with feminism, see?
Anyway, being able to be stoic is very important when the appropriate occasion rises and other people need you to not be phased. I don't know if it can be done for oneself, or applied to one's entire demeanor unless that person is in a torture chamber. It seems connected to a greater good, like standing up against oppression or suffering so others don't, which I guess ties in with the motivation you're talking about, but to me stoic doesn't tie in with guys who go to the mountain tops to become themselves and that kind of stuff. If they didn't create the situation, they're stoic. If they climb Mount Everrest to prove something to themselves, that's really different, even though it does involve pushing oneself through insane conditions to survive. I don't have a word for that, but I always associated stoic with rising against an enemy or going through hell for the sake of a moral ideal.
i agree with dee. watch a movie called gone baby gone. its about a really smart guy who remains calm and centered even though crazyness is all around him. He does what he knows he should simply because he doesnt get sucked into the panic and keeps his mind and his morals with him. Also, dee, don't expect a todler to be tough. its not in their nature, although, hes already had stiches and instigates uprisings. From my seat id say hes a pretty tough little guy, especially considering how adorable he is.
as for the dance floor, while it would be nice to hook up with a girl you've not even talked to, the girls that are willing to do said hooking up, are not usually the girls i want to have sex with. the dance floor girls are either simply window shopping at the meat market(a term i picked up from a description of clubs in aspen), or out for a fun night with friends. the ones that are there for a mindful good time are most likely going to be more impressed by your personality, because you have one and your not some random guy trying to grind on 'em. The ones that want to be grinded on by some random guy have usually been grinded on regularly and submissively, which means the aggresive dominant male wins. All you have to do to bang some ho on the dance floor is act like all these bitches at the club are simply titties and pussy waiting for a dick(instead of decent people waiting for a genuine connection.) As attractive as they often are, its kinda weird knowing that if they would have sex with me(skinny and a bad dancer) without talking to me, then who the else has had their go.
Blunderguff
I worked at a mexican restaurant. Jose was a guy who was very nice. We wanted to have some beers outside of work. He said either my house or the forest preserve. His house. At his house I met his roomate. There was one bed. I joked "what do you guys sleep in the same bed!?" I realized very quickly I was a bit naive. gayness. They told me I could leave. I said gayness was no reason to leave. We rented a movie...BIG FISH! Plug the movie in. A few beers and the gayness amplified and my discomfort boiled over. I skidaddled never finishing Big Fish. When I hear Big Fish I think hairless gay extreme awkwardness...very different from your Big Fish experience. Crazy world.
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