Kyle's woes

What's new? I'll tell you what's new, but you may want to sit down first. And grab a roll of paper towl. It's gonna be messy. I tore my neck muscle the other day carrying a VCR, which means I'm in top-notch shape. What's worse, the VCR was supposed to replace a slightly broken one in the lab, but all it did was eat the first tape we put in it. I think it's cursed. Besides that, the government is jerking me around. I have a grant application in to the NIH and it may not happen due to scarcity of money for non-defense-related science (go Bush!) and a surly review committee. Add to that a headache, a slightly chapped lower lip, an empty fridge and a cat that has been peeing on anything soft in the house, and you have woes a'plenty.