Wednesday, December 19, 2007
That time of year
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Breaking Cousin News
Hopefully this will increase the number of cousin weddings that I can't go to to 3. What happened to you cousin weddings? you used to be cool.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Stick Figures in Peril
Monday, December 10, 2007
Friday, November 30, 2007
New Year's Resolution Part 2
1. Walden by Thoreau (336)
2. Civil Disobedience by Thoreau(384)
3. The call of the wild by
4. The Sea Wolf by
5. Meditations of John Muir by John Muir(144)
6. Stickeen by John Muir (84)
7. In Our Time by Hemingway(160)
8. The Naked and the Dead by Mailer(736)
9. Good Dog, Stay by Quindlen(96)
10. The Adventures of Augie March by Saul Bellow(608)
11. Blood
12. Catch 22 by Heller (464)
13. Anti-Christ by Moses(396)
14. Neuromancer by Gibson (288)
15. Ragtime by Doctorow(288)
16. Dianetics by L. Ron Hubbard (163)
17. A Piece of Blue Sky: L. Ron Exposed by Atack, Miller (428)
18. Hatchet by Paulsen (one in series of 5) (192)
19. Zan-Gah by Shickman(160)
20. Outlander by Gabaldon(850)
21. Wrinkle in Time by L'Engle (224)
22. A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bryson(560)
23. Quartzsite Trip by Hogon(322)
24. The Testament of Gideon Mack by Robertson (400)
25. The God Delusion by Dawkins (416)
26. White Noise by DeLillo(336)
27. The
28. As I Lay Dying by Faulkner(267)
29. Secret Agent by Conrad (197)
30. The Godfather by Puzo (496)
31. The Sicilian by Puzo(416)
32. The Godfather Returns by Puzo (648)
33. The Last Don by Puzo(502)
34. Jonathon Livingston Seagull by Bach (112)
35. Illusions by Bach(192)
36. There’s No Such Place as Faraway by Bach(48)
37. Jitterbug Perfume by Robbins(352)
38. Another Roadside Attraction by Robbins(352)
39. Galapagos by Vonnegut(336)
40. God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian by Vonnegut (80)
41. Less than Zero by Ellis(208)
42. Thus spoke Zarathustra by Nietzsche(352)
43. A Spot of Bother by Haddon(354)
44. 100 Years of Solitude by Marquez (448)
45. Hell’s Angels by Thompson(273)
46. The Idiot by Dostoevsky (608)
47. Anti-Christ by Nietzsche (91)
48. The Selfish Gene by Dawkins (360)
49. A Brief History of Time by Hawking (224)
50. Blaming the Brain by Valenstein (292)
51. Breaking the Spell by Dennett (464)
52. Tuva or Bust! By Feyman (256)
53. Steppenwolf by
54. Laughing Boy by La Farge (208)
55. Arrow of God by Achebe (230)
56. No Longer at Ease by Achebe (194)
57. Electric Kool Aid Acid Test by Wolfe (416)
58. The Reivers by Faulkner (320)
59. Harvest Poems by Sandburg (128)
60. Captain Pamphile by Dumas (200)
61. Count of Monte Cristo by Dumas (634)
62. Lonesome Traveler by Kerouac (192)
63. Into the
64. Population Bomb by Ehrlich (201)
65. Monkey Wrench by Levi (176)
66. The Teachings of Buddha (250)
67. Holy Bible (803)
68. The Koran (528)
69. Ficciones by Borges (176)
70. Panic Rising by Nunn (232)
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
New Years Resolution
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Tit for...
The tat was inked in San Diego at a place called Church of Steel by a portly German named Marcel, with a mixed rockabilly/goth style. While I was there another artist got a call, and the secretary said "Hey, remember that dude whose face you tattooed yesterday? Well, he's coming in and he's pissed!" I missed the confrontation unfortunately.
Adding to the experience, I saw a screaming load of girls crowded around these guys.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Dear Rob
Can you send our cousin Bryan an invite or email or something that tells him how to get back on the cousin blog. He just upgraded his Caleco to a real computer and can now access that new thing called the interweb. You may want to enclose explicit directions and possibly colored drawings to assist him (he also likes pop up books). I know you're busy but if you have the time help a cousin out. Thanks much.
Sincerely,
Cousin Matt
Saturday, October 27, 2007
You'v e just been Nard-Dogged
Some movies I really hate, off the top of my head:
Armageddon
Planet of the Apes (new version)
Cruel Intentions
Bridget Jones’ Diary
Patch Adams
Instinct
Roadhouse (not!)
Fracture
Fahrenheit 9/11
Anything involving Dane Cooke in any capacity whatsoever (ditto Matthew Lillard)
Nacho Libre
Fantastic Four
Some recent movies that I found really disappointing:
Apocalypto
Crash
Blood Diamond
Shrek
Super Troopers
Thursday, October 25, 2007
After some thought, I've decided that my favorite movie in the last while has got to be Children of Men.
Adobe Illustrator kicks ass.
So do the BoSox. Eat it Denver.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
The Awesome Power of Clams
For those of you you who need to throw up RIGHT NOW comes the miracle invention that will change the drinking world as we know it. In a breakthrough concept, Budweiser has combined the awesome power of Clamato with a beer once thought to be at its peak. Lets look at the timeline that led to this amazing creation.
2nd day of Creation: God invents water (key ingredient in Budweiser)
3rd day of Creation: God invents tomatoes as well as malts, hops, sugar, etc.
1876: Budweiser Lager Beer is born as the brainchild of Adolphus Busch and Eberhard Anheuser
1969: Walter Chell thinks to himself "You know what would make tomato juice better......mashed clams." Clamato is born.
2007: Anheuser-Busch combines Budweiser and Clamato for the super drink now known as Chelada.
2008: Greenhouse gases produced from Chelada vomit destroys the ozone. Life on this planet ceases to exist.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Cousin Sighting
I was driving, Kyle was riding shotgun, and Matt was in the backseat. He had a laptop case with weed in it. As we pulled into a parking lot, our cat slid through the open window and escaped. Someone had left a holigram running in the parking lot, and Matt didn't realize it was fake. It was a woman dressed as a nurse and she was asking Matt what he thought about this kitty (motioning toward a holigram cat rubbing up against her leg). I can't see her front but I know she's a kitty porn video, and I'm laughing at the look on Matt's face cuz he still doesn't know its fake. Then I'm gripped with horror at the thought of there being kitty porn people nearby while our cat is missing.
The dream also included a hotel that could blast into outer space like a rocket, a suggestion from our friends that we meet up in Jersey for a wedding even though none of us have anything to do with "Jersey", Owen Wilson as a lifeguard at the pool I belong to (which is in an occupied zone, or maybe a green zone right near battle lines, I could watch bombs and planes and then go swimming), a bat belonging to Owen which I found laying in a bell, exhausted and perhaps wearing shorts, and which I returned to him, and a clarification of the term "Morty" as in "Show it to Morty and he'll show it to God."
Friday, October 12, 2007
Monday, October 08, 2007
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Call that a depressing Personal Profile?
Underweight yet flabby MWM with terribly itchy eyes seeks like-minded MWM to commiserate over total lack of time to do anything but clean up after messy babies and do laundry once in awhile. No fatties.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Personal profile
Rubb, I accidently left both of the Peru maps at your house. Do you have them? Can I have one? I will listen to your previously posted music selections.





